Failure or Success in the World of Paranormal Romance

You open your email and you are met with the paranormal romance editor's name.

Your heart races. Your hands are sweaty. You roll your eyes and cross your fingers. Then you click.

We're sorry but...

And you stop reading. You have a decision—slam your computer shut and cuss, or cuss and go to Facebook/Twitter.*

*Warning: Facebooking angry is never a great idea. It's like a drunk dial to your entire friends (paranormal romance writers or not) list that will be constantly accessible.

Whether you are conscious of it or not, this moment will define you. Are you a paranormal romance writer who will spend the rest of the day licking your wounds and then spring back to your project limping, but stronger? Or are you a person who lets the rejection crush you? Does the fear of another rejection letter keep you from submitting your paranormal romance again? Or, from checking your email for days?

Fear of failure is a constant enemy...Telling someone that you have fallen short of your goal is one of the most humbling experiences a person can have, yet for a paranormal romance writer it is important.

Why?

It keeps you grounded and it makes you stronger.

Every paranormal romance writer in the world is (as author Bob Mayer likes to say) 'on the wrong side of the bell curve.' ‘We are not normal.’  In every author, there is some part of them that tells them they are special and deserving of publication. This drive is called Ego (thank you Freud).

Ego is not bad.  In fact, it is the driving force behind most successful people.

I'm not saying that writers are egomaniacal narcissists...In fact, quite the opposite.

Most paranormal romance writers are rejected and beaten so many times that when they become successful, it's amazing that they can do book signings without shirking from peoples' touch. 

Ego is the drive that keeps us from stopping, from letting other's opinions and judgement keep us from reaching our goal.  Our egos keep us working. 

We take a lot of beatings and we face constant 'failure.' But to comfort our bruised egos we must remember that though we will be rejected this is not tantamount to failure. We have already met some level of success—we have had the courage to follow our dreams.

It Only Takes a Moment

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.                                 - Leo Buscaglia

I have a memory that haunts me.

Ten years ago (long before being a paranormal romance author), I worked at a large retail store, was going to college, and was filled with the joy of life. A young man whom I had known growing up, walked through the doors and seeing me, waved and eagerly approached. His hair was dirty and disheveled, his clothes ratty and torn, but he smiled.

Though I was at work, we chatted as I showed him around the store. He told me he was still living at home with his Grandmother, whom had adopted him when his mother had lost custody. With sadness in his eyes, he told me about a few things going on in his life, that weren't working out.

 

I felt immeasurable pity for my peer. But after a few minutes, I needed to return to work. Before he would let me go, he shoved his phone number, cell number and email address in my hand.

 

That night I went home, still thinking about the conversation. He seemed so desperate and needy and I decided not to call him. I didn't need any more drama in my life. I had homework, school, work, social engagements, and problems of my own...my time was precious.

 

We had caught up, what else could be left to say?

 

About four months later, I received a call from another friend. The young man who had

barely fallen short of begging me to be his friend had been found in his grandmother's

house--after he had committed suicide.

 

At 18, I had missed the truth of his situation. Yet I cannot shake the feeling that if I would have only called him back, if I would have made room in my life, if I would have just lent a helping hand, the young man would have still been alive. After that phone call, my life changed. I began responding to people who reached out, I try to listen to those who have problems they need to share, and the most important thing I have learned is that it only takes a moment to turn a life around.

Paranormal Romance Author Danica Winters Interview, Hosted by Author Sue Lyndon

This week my friend and fellow author, Sue Lyndon, hosted me on her blog.   In addition to my interview being posted on her blog, I thought I needed to post it for my loyal paranormal romance readers.  I hope you enjoy learning a little bit about me!

Sue: Who are a few of your favorite authors?

Danica: There are so many wonderful authors (paranormal romance etc.), past and present, that picking a single name is a challenge.  I have loved to read romance since I was old enough to borrow them from my Mother’s office, but my favorite has to be another author who used to call Montana his home, James Welch, and his book, Fools Crow.

Sue: Do you like to listen to music while you write?  If so, who are your favorite artists?

Danica: I normally write with background noise.  It forces me to concentrate and often it helps to put me into the mood of a paranormal romance scene.  Write now I am writing the second book in a dark series and while I do, I enjoy an amazing pianist, Emile Pandolfi.  My favorite song is, Let Me Fall, from his Believe album.  I’ve played the piano since I was five years old and hearing a master play can bring tears to my eyes.

Sue: Coffee or tea?

Danica:  My friends will tell you that it isn't normal to see me without a cup of coffee in my hands.  I'm a writer and a Mom.  That means staying up until the wee hours of the morning and then having childrens' smiling faces waking me whenever they think I should be getting up.

Sue: What is your ultimate writing goal?

Danica: My ultimate goal as a paranormal romance writer is to create books that capture the hearts of my readers.

I want to have my readers not only learn about my characters, but in some small way, themselves.  In Curse of the Wolf, the first paranormal romance book in The Curse of the Veela Series, I raise the point that we must not be controlled by our hatred or fear.  We as people must learn to forgive and move on from the traumas and pains of our pasts in order to become stronger, to grow.

I think in every great paranormal romance novel, we must walk away with a message.

Sue: How do you go about choosing names for your characters?

Danica: I like to include my readers in naming my characters.  I think it is a fun, rewarding, and interactive experience to let my readers get their hands in on creating a major element of upcoming novels and short stories.  My fans are what keep me going and I like to include them in my creative process as much as possible.

Sue: Tell us about your upcoming writing projects.

Danica: I am working on the next paranormal romance novel in the upcoming Veela Curse Series.  At this point, I have almost completed writing the second book and am beginning to come up with concepts for the third.  Between paranormal romance novels, I like to write my short stories; and as much as I would like to say I plan these ahead, they are usually created as I write.

Sue: Tell us a little bit about your newest release. 

Danica" I have a short story entitled, The Devil’s Angel, being released March 31^st, 2012 through Silver Publishing; and this summer I will have my first novel in The Veela Curse Series entitled, Curse of the Wolf, being published by Ravenous Romance. 

As a treat for readers, I have included a little sample from, The Devil’s Angel.  Enjoy!

The Devil’s Angel:

Sarah was no angel, but for the first time in her adult life, she found herself holding wire wings covered with what looked like an old pair of white nylons as she fidgeted with her ill-fitting saint mask.

She hated Halloween, and this year was no exception, the day just another excuse for her idiotic co-workers to get drunk and fondle each other.

Maybe what upset her the most was the fact she didn't have anyone to fondle her. Regardless, her solo status was only made worse by being at her boss's house, which was just then filled with a bunch of drunken ass-grabbers wearing the only attire allowed—their company's line of Halloween themed lingerie.

She slammed her car door shut. Her high heels clicked on the walkway as she tugged at the laced edges of the white satin corset that had ridden up her side. She tried to calm her racing heart as she readjusted her tilted halo.

The thumping noise of the party greeted her as she made her way up the concrete steps that led to her boss’s front door.

"Are you alone, little angel?" a man asked.

She looked up at him as he leaned against the bricks of the arched entryway. His face and body were the same shade of red as the front door of the house and he had black, cow-like horns extending above his ears.

"Who's asking?"

"The Devil.” He laughed wickedly. "Or, as I would prefer—your Devil."

She slid her arms into the holes of the lop-sided wings and stepped closer to the mysterious black-haired man.

"How 'bout this, Devil. Let's stick together and make a pass around the idiot circuit, and then we can see where things take us?" She looped her arm around his and reached up to stroke his muscular chest.

She was acting like a tramp, but wearing the mask made her feel protected by the anonymity the thin plastic offered. She could say what she wanted, to whomever she wanted. The effect was exhilarating and unexpectedly empowering. Usually, she was the quiet underling, but tonight she could be the fallen angel. And if he was lucky, she could be his fallen angel….(The Devil’s Angel, Released March 31^st, 2012)  

Sue:  I can't wait to read, the paranormal romance The Devil's Angel.  Thank you for your time!

Danica:  Thank you, Sue.  I enjoyed sharing.  I hope everyone enjoys, The Devil's Angel!